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Why It’s Important to Review What Happens if a Child Predeceases You


 

Hi Everyone,

This month’s Members’ Hub note includes a personal reflection on preserving family stories, along with an important reminder about reviewing your will and checking what happens if a child or beneficiary dies before you.


 

A Personal Note on Family Stories, and an Important Will Reminder

Firstly, thank God the rain finally stopped.

We got to spend four nights down in Baltimore with family, something that was badly needed. Lots of rest, long walks, fresh air and proper downtime.

While there, we travelled out to Bere Island, where my great-grandparents and great-great-grandparents are buried. My grandmother grew up there, and I got to see her ancestral home for the very first time. My late father had spent quite a bit of time there over the years visiting his uncle, whom he was very fond of.

Standing there, I realised how much family stories matter and how easily they can be lost over generations. I found myself wishing I had visited it with Dad, so I could have asked him all the questions he had heard from his own mother growing up.

It really reinforced for me how important it is to preserve family stories, memories and history.

Because of that, I have started work on a new project called The Memoirs, a guided and prompted life-story journal designed to help document memories, milestones and family history for future generations. Keep an eye out for it over the next year.

This Month’s Legal Topic

Now onto this month’s legal topic, and this is a very important one.

I was recently contacted by a lady whose mother had made a will leaving her estate equally between her two daughters.

One daughter was happily married with children. The other daughter had recently married a man whom the family never really trusted and who, sadly, had not treated her particularly well.

Tragically, that daughter died unexpectedly before her mother. Her mother was devastated and never got the opportunity to update her will before she herself passed away a year later.

The problem was this:

The will still left half of the estate to the daughter who had already died.

Under Section 98 of the Succession Act, and I often say that the Succession Act is the “Bible” when it comes to wills, where a child predeceases a parent, the law can treat that child as though they survived the parent and then died afterwards.

This means their inheritance can pass into their own estate.

In this particular case, the deceased daughter had no children, meaning her share ultimately passed to her husband, the very person the family would never have intended to benefit.

This situation could have been completely avoided with proper clauses in the will.

What Should Happen if a Child Predeceases?

Where a child predeceases:

  • if they leave children, their share should pass directly to those children; and
  • if they leave no children, their share should revert back to the surviving siblings.

I cannot stress enough how important these clauses are.

In the last month alone, I have reviewed three wills drafted elsewhere where these protective clauses had not been included, including one case involving an in-law relationship that had already broken down.

I have attached the wording of the clauses that I regularly include in wills to deal with this issue.

What to Review in the Members’ Hub

Please log back into the Members’ Hub and review:

If they are not included, and you have concerns about where a predeceased child’s inheritance may ultimately end up, it may be worth discussing an update to your will with your solicitor.

As always, I hope this helps.

Jacquelyn

The Journey, Lived In: A Real Story


 

Hi Everyone,

I want to share a small moment with you that really stayed with me.

Recently, I met my Aunt Marie for a cup of tea. Marie is my late dad’s sister, and she was actually one of the very first people to get her hands on The Journey when I created it.

At the time, it was just a very basic version, something I had printed and put together myself. I asked her to take it away and tell me honestly what worked, what did not, and what was missing.

When I sat down with her again before Christmas, after she had been using it for almost a year, I saw something that stayed with me. Her Journey was not just filled in. It was lived in.


 

More Than a Folder Filled In

Seeing Marie’s Journey in real life reminded me that this was never meant to be something you fill in once and set aside forever.

It was meant to become something personal. Something useful. Something you return to, update, and make your own over time.

Marie had done exactly that.

She had not only completed the pages. She had lived with them. She had added notes, included the right documents, and used the folder the way it was intended to be used. That was powerful to see, because it showed me that The Journey can become part of someone’s real life, not just another piece of paperwork.


 

Before The Journey

Before using The Journey, Marie’s important information was kept in a lock box. It was safe, but like many people’s systems, it was simply a place where things were stored. It did not offer the same structure, prompts, or guidance around what someone else might actually need to know.

That is where The Journey made a difference.

It gave her one clear place to gather not only documents, but also the information and instructions that might otherwise be missed or left unsaid.

It brought together practical details, personal wishes, and the kind of information that loved ones often struggle to piece together in the middle of stress or grief.

Watch The Clip Here



 

It Can Feel Overwhelming at First

One of the most honest things Marie shared was that it can feel hard to get started.

At first glance, it can seem like a lot. That is completely understandable. These are not everyday topics, and many of us are not used to sitting down and gathering this kind of information.

But what helped was taking it one section at a time.

That is such an important reminder. The Journey does not need to be completed all in one sitting. You can begin with one part, do what you can, and come back to the rest. Often, starting is the hardest part. Once that first page is filled, the rest becomes much more manageable.

Watch The Clip Here



 

The Prompts Make It Easier

Marie also said that the prompts made the process much easier.

Rather than wondering what should be included, the folder guided her through what was important to gather, what needed to be updated, and what might otherwise be forgotten.

That is a huge part of why The Journey exists.

Many people want to get organised. Many people want to make life easier for their loved ones. But they do not always know where to begin. The prompts help remove that uncertainty. They turn a big emotional task into something much more practical and doable.

Watch The Clip Here




Things She Hadn’t Thought About Before

Some of the most valuable parts of the process were the things Marie had not previously considered.

That included details around incapacity, where someone needs help communicating wishes or managing important matters during their lifetime, not only after death.

It also included smaller but deeply important areas that can easily be overlooked, like pets.

In fact, the pets section was one of Marie’s own contributions in those early stages. It came from real life and real care, which is exactly how The Journey has been shaped all along.

These details matter because they reflect the full picture of a person’s life, not just their paperwork.

Watch The Clip Here

 


 

Why This Matters for Loved Ones

Marie has her niece named as her executor.

And I know, without hesitation, that if anything ever happened, her niece would have been completely overwhelmed trying to piece everything together.

But now, she will not have to guess.

She will not have to search.

She will not have to worry about missing something important.

Because Marie has already done the hard part. She has made things clear.

That is what The Journey was always meant to do.

Not simply organise information, but lift a weight off the shoulders of the people we love.

When someone is grieving or under pressure, even simple tasks can feel enormous. Knowing where the documents are, understanding someone’s wishes, and having clear instructions in one place can make an incredibly difficult time just a little less heavy.

A Quiet Kind of Gift

The most moving thing about seeing Marie’s folder was not just how organised it was.

It was what that organisation meant.

It meant care.
It meant thoughtfulness.
It meant that someone had taken the time to make things easier for the people who may one day need to step in.

That is a quiet kind of gift, but a very meaningful one.

A Gentle Reminder

If you already have your own Journey, this is your gentle reminder to dip back into it.

Add to it.
Update it.
Make it your own.

And if you have not started yet, begin with one section. That is enough. You do not need to do everything at once.

Because one day, it will not just be a folder.

It will be a gift to the people you love most.

Warmly,
Jacquelyn

Advanced Healthcare Directives


 

What Is an Advanced Healthcare Directive (AHD)?

 

An Advanced Healthcare Directive is a written document where you:

Say what medical treatment you would or would not want in case you become too unwell to speak for yourself

It only applies if you lose the ability to make or communicate decisions.


 

What can an Advanced Healthcare Directive Cover?

An Advanced Healthcare Directive can cover a number of important areas.

1. Refusing Certain Treatments

You can legally refuse specific medical treatments in advance, such as:

  • Life-sustaining treatment in certain circumstances
  • Artificial Feeding
  • CPR
  • Ventilation

If properly completed, a valid refusal must be followed by doctors.

2. Expressing Your Wishes

You can also include your preferences around care, such as:

  • Where you would prefer to be cared for
  • Your comfort preferences
  • Religious or personal wishes

These wishes are not legally binding, but doctors must take them into account.

3. Appointing a Healthcare Representative

You can name someone you trust to:

  • speak to doctors on your behalf
  • make healthcare decisions on your behalf
  • help ensure your wishes are respected

This person only acts if you lose capacity.

 


 

What it is Not:

It is important to understand what an Advanced Healthcare Directive is not. It is not:

  • A will
  • About money or property
  • A funeral plan
  • Something that takes effect immediately

It only relates to medical decisions if you can no longer make or communicate those decisions yourself.

 


 

Is It Legally Binding in Ireland?

Yes - under the Assisted Decision-Making (Capacity) Act 2015, a valid refusal of treatment in an Advanced Healthcare Directive is legally binding.

Doctors must follow it.

 

I am giving you a blank Advanced HealthCare Directive (AHD) to print off, complete and place in The Journey Folder. Make sure to let your representative know where it is held. The AHD I am providing you clearly sets out how to properly and legally complete the form so that it is valid. But I want to give you a few examples of how someone might complete it because you may not be a medic and may not be familiar with the treatments that may be offered if you did lose capacity.

Your Advanced Healthcare Directive Template



 

A Real Life Example:

Let’s take the example of Mary.

Mary is 78. She is a widow and has four adult children.

She is admitted to hospital with severe pneumonia. Her condition suddenly worsens and she becomes unconscious. The doctors now need consent to make important medical decisions.

Her children are asked, What would your mum have wanted?”

They look at each other, but no one is sure.

In situations like this, families may be asked to make decisions about treatments such as ventilation, artificial feeding, dialysis, or high-risk surgery. These decisions are incredibly difficult, especially when there has never been a conversation or written guidance.

Without an Advanced Healthcare Directive, family members can find themselves disagreeing, doubting themselves, or carrying guilt long after the crisis has passed.

With an Advanced Healthcare Directive, the person’s wishes are already there in writing. It removes guesswork and helps guide decision-making at an already emotional time.

The Decisions Family Be Asked To Make:

 

1. A Ventilator (Breathing Machine)

Mary cannot breathe properly.

The doctor explains: "We can place her on a ventilator in ICU. It involves inserting a tube into her throat.”

This may save her life. But if she is very frail, it may only prolong dying.

Without guidance, the children struggle:

“Do everything.”

“She wouldn’t want this.”

“What if we’re wrong?”

If Mary had written in her directive:

“If I am unlikely to recover to a meaningful quality of life, I refuse mechanical ventilation.”

The decision is clear.

The children are not left guessing.

 

2. Artificial Feeding (Feeding Tube)

Mary cannot swallow.

The team asks: “Should we insert a feeding tube?”

This could keep her alive long-term but possibly without awareness or recovery.

If Mary had written:

“If I am permanently unconscious or have no realistic prospect of recovery, I do not want artificial feeding.”

Her wishes are respected.

Her children are relieved of that burden.

 

3. Dialysis (Kidney Failure)

Mary’s kidneys begin to fail.

Doctors explain: “Dialysis could keep her alive, but it would mean ongoing hospital treatment several times a week.”

If Mary had written:

“If my condition is irreversible, I do not wish to commence dialysis.”

Her children do not have to weigh life against suffering.

She has already made that choice.

 

4. High-Risk Surgery

Mary develops a serious complication that may require emergency surgery.

The doctor says: “We can operate, but the risks are significant and recovery may be very limited.”

If Mary had written:

“I do not wish to undergo high-risk surgery where the likelihood of returning to independent living is low.”

Her values guide the outcome.

 

Without an Advanced Healthcare Directive

The family debates.

Old tensions surface.

Someone feels guilty.

Someone feels pressured.

Someone worries forever:

“Did we do the right thing?”



 

Section 2: Treatment I Do NOT Want To Receive

Here are some examples to help you complete section 2 of the AHD because we are not all medics and may not be aware right now of what treatments would be offered.

You might write:

Treatment: Mechanical ventilation (breathing machine).

Circumstances: If I have an irreversible condition such as a severe stroke, advanced dementia, or terminal illness, and there is no reasonable prospect of recovering to a meaningful quality of life.

 

Treatment: Artificial feeding and hydration (feeding tubes).

Circumstances: If I am permanently unconscious or in the final stages of a terminal illness with no prospect of recovery.

 

Treatment: Dialysis or high-risk major surgery.

Circumstances: If my doctors believe my condition is irreversible and I am unlikely to return to independent living or awareness.

 

Section 3: Treatment I Would Like To Receive

You might write:

Treatment: Full pain relief and comfort care, even if it may unintentionally shorten my life.

Circumstances: If I am dying or in significant pain with no realistic prospect of recovery.

 

Treatment: Antibiotics, fluids, oxygen and non-invasive treatment.

Circumstances: Where recovery to a meaningful quality of life is reasonably likely.

 


 

Peace of Mind for You and Your Family

Your directive removes guesswork. Instead of your family having to debate difficult decisions in the middle of a crisis, your wishes can guide the outcome.

This may not be for everyone, and it may feel too overwhelming or sad to think about. That is completely understandable. But if it is something you worry about, or if you have experienced the upset and confusion of being asked to make these kinds of decisions for a parent or loved one, I hope this month’s resource and the Advanced Healthcare Directive will help to bring you some peace of mind.

Warmest regards,
Jacquelyn



Access the resources here:

Your Advanced Healthcare Directive Template